Umineko No Naku Koro Ni Episode II-IV: Emo Furniture fingers himself

Rosa enters the fray with the gun and the first thing she wants to do is bust a cap in the servants’ asses…


Battler and the others realize they haven’t seen Jessica all day. So they go to her room to find her on the floor murdered, and Kanon missing. Rosa finds Jessica’s key on her night stand and since the door was locked… *cue Meta-world scene 5*

During this scene, Battler says that the number of master keys was unclear during the first game. So Beato decides to state in red that there are only five Master Keys, one per servant. Of course, after the pause on the Meta scene, Rosa accuses Gohda and Kumasawa of killing Jessica and even claims Kanon is in on it since he’s missing. Battler doesn’t want Kanon being a suspect, so he tries to clear him by pointing out that Jessica still has his Master Key in her pocket since she took it. Beatrice congratulates Battler on a good argument after resuming the Meta-world scene and states more red and then tells Meta-Battler that he created the closed room since he refuses to suspect anyone close to him.


Go talk to the key maker from The Matrix Reloaded…


Now I know not to piss Gohda off…

Furniture shouldn’t even be allowed to have keys…

Until proven guilty in the court of law…

Do trap doors count?

I read that as ‘One Per Serving’… Now I’m hungry.

I wonder why i haven’t gotten dizzy from all that red…

The human or the furniture?

Can’t you unlock the door from the inside?

Can’t you lock it from the Inside?

After that meta world scene ends, Battler gives up in trying to prove Emo Furniture’s innocence, which is the best decision he ever made. He shakes hands with Rosa and they all return to the parlor. Maria talks about the Wolves and Sheep puzzle and Rosa decides to make Nanjo and the other servants gtfo. Rosa clearly thinks of them as wolves and proves she’s not a wolf when she states that She would’ve Shot Battler and George a long time ago and blame Beatrice for it.

Meanwhile, Nanjo and the servants are in the kitchen, waiting for Gohda’s cooking until they hear a sound from outside. Mr. Clean gets a knife ready and Gohda opens the door, and whaddya know, Emo Furniture falls down, leaking plenty of blood. Kanon claims Rosa is the culprit and the servants take the time to help him. After taking his ass to the servant’s room, Kanon keeps going on about how Rosa did it, and that he’s been killed already.

Shannon decides to look for a can of Mr. Clean’s products and during that, Kanon gets up and acts just fine. He claims he’s fine and even fingers his wound. I would’ve called him GAR for that, but that’s just disgusting. It sounded like a sound effect from a hentai when the guy fingers the girl down there. Kanon then pulls out his little light stick and slits Nanjo and Kumasawa’s necks. From here it’s all a game of football, as Genji tackles Shanon (to save her), and Gohda tackles Emo Furniture to restrain him. Mr. Clean goes GAR and throws a knife at Emo Furniture’s arm and Shannon gives him his cleaning product and proceeds to clean the hell out of Emo Furniture until he disappears.

That makes absolutely no sense…

Oooh, looks like the furniture got a little tarnished…

Kanon: Ai Rabbieu

Why wasn’t I told that this show was a hentai?

From your Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman!

This is how my Fantasy Football team plays…

Mr. Clean: cleaning scum like this fuck since 1958

I’m really tempted to say that you three killed them…


Alright, this episode was pretty informative with the red texts, but I still got questions, and they’re gonna keep coming. First and foremost, Kumasawa and Nanjo’s deaths, caused by Kanon… can’t be real. The queen declared his death in red. The knife Genji picked up, I could’ve said that he, Gohda and Shannon assisted in killing the two, and it would make perfect since as to why Gohda is panicking. Criminal minds are such difficult puzzles…

But I’ll wait for the red truth on this case before i make any better guesses. Of course, Jessica and Kanon’s case, I could say that the corpse in Jessica’s room, is not Jessica’s corpse. That’s probably Kanon’s corpse dressed up like Jessica. No one never really bothered to look around… And in that case, I’m tempted to say Jessica is the culprit. I won’t explain the motive, but with that kind of reasoning above,  then It would be her corpse that’s missing, not Kanon’s.

Disguising the corpse is a good disappearing trick, don’t you think?

As far as that key goes, Since there aren’t any duplicates… How about I put it this way since i noticed Jessica’s key resembles the master key the servants have: That key Rosa found on Jessica’s nightstand, was not Jessica’s Key, but one of the master Keys and the key that was in Jessica’s pocket could’ve been a complete fake, one that doesn’t open any doors. Since the keys can be duplicated, then they can be faked, right?

Ah well, on to the next episode.


Posted on September 24, 2009, in Anime, Umineko no Naku Koro Ni. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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